Designer & bike rider in British Columbia, Canada

Up Yours Victoria Transit

So as if my freaking weekend performance at the squash tournament wasn’t shitty enough, I fuck myself by trying to take BC-Fucking-Transit home from the post-tourny party out in god damn Broadmead to my house on the top of freaking Cedar Hill.
Even at a party of 40 people, three quarters of which were heading downtown at 10pm, I wasn’t having much luck catching a ride. No worries, the Royal Oak Exchange—like, only the biggest bus area in Saanich—is only three blocks from Stuart’s party house. It’s 10:45pm: I should be able to catch the next #Fucking-6, transfer at McKenzie, walk the half km to my house.
So then it’s 11:45pm. One fucking hour I’ve been shivering out here at the largest bus loop in Saanich and not a single stinking hunk o’ shit bus has come by and I’m so angry because the posted schedule said there should have been one at 11:01 and another at 11:29 and I actually kick the waist-high schedule attached to its metal post with my foot and now it’s vibrating (the schedule and post) back and forth real fast and the wind is right howling through the willows and the weeds near the stop and it reminds me of camping in the Yukon as a kid, camping at Jumbo Pass near a freaking glacier and listening to the wind of death but back then I had a -20-degree down sleeping bag and North Face jacket and now I have some nylon piece o’ shell and a Gap shirt and I feel like I am on a glacier and I can’t read the damn sign it’s boinging back and forth so fast and then this creepy old pervert in a black car is parked in a driveway right next to me, and he and his stupid puffy dog in the back seat are watching me and I am so angry I just pray he says something to me so I can unleash.
And then the sign slows down and I can read again and double-check for the 8th time in the last ten minutes that it is indeed Saturday’s schedule, #6, Royal Oak, not a fucking holiday, not on strike, in Victoria, on earth, 21st bloody century. And then there’s this god damn little side box in the bottom left—I’m now getting to the I Hate BC Transit part—that says “buses on the schedule not listed with a fucking retarded little letter E or C next to them are in fact not going to ever ever come by the fucking stop you’re standing at right now, the damn stop you’ve gone by ten hundred times on your weekly fucking transit trips back from Vancouver and seen thousands of loosers catch their #6 from.”
So the bus stop for buses at 11:01, 11:29 and 11:45 p.m. is actually around the corner, the bus stop just within sight where you’ve been watching numerous other buses go by and stop at, but because you were facing the fucking driver side you couldn’t see the number and assumed they were some fucking far off trailer park-land buses bound for Esquimalt or some such shit, but which were in fact the damn #6 two times.
So you run over there and manage to catch the last 6 of the night and by the time you get off at McKenzie and Quadra the last #26 doesn’t come for another 20 minutes so you walk home, from McKenzie and Quadra, a 2 or so km hike, normally enough to fucking piss me off.
But fucking brilliant I changed the insoles in my squash shoes a couple games before the tournament this weekend and naturally developed these amazingly uniform loonie-sized bubble blisters under my arches, the likes of which I’d been strapping down with hockey tape all tournament in an effort to stop their sloshing and leaking and bleeding and which I swore I wouldn’t aggravate any further after Saturday afternoon, after I shaved the hair off the top of my feet and tore off the last of the tape, and then—ass that I am—assuming rides from fellow players, or from BC Transit at worst, would keep me off them, keep me from walking or having to ride my bike for the 8,000th time this winter…But no, I get to walk on them AND my fucking shite knees from McKenzie and Quadra to my desolate hole on top of Cedar Hill.
I hobble at the best of times just getting to the kitchen.
And so now it’s 1 a.m. and I’m going mtbing in 7.5 hours and I blame fucking conservative middle class suburban Victoria and their 2.1 cars per person consumption habits, even when it’s over a dollar a litre, for keeping the transit system down and underfunded and underused and over $2 bucks a ride.
And I blame the damn transit system itself for making the most unclear, ineffective and unusable god damn schedules and bus stops and entire bus system I had the bright idea of putting my faith into tonight.


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Comments

13 Responses to “Up Yours Victoria Transit”

  1. Jenn Avatar
    Jenn

    So it was a good party?

  2. Mark Avatar
    Mark

    Based on your temperment, I would assume that hitch hiking would have been a great alternative. If somehting had happened, then you would have had the creative outburst that you were looking for, and if not, then you would have had a ride home at least.
    In the end, at least you got to write a drunk message on your webpage.

  3. Tyler Avatar
    Tyler

    What you think Jeff was drunk when writing this message? No way, just angry. So very angry…..

  4. Kris Avatar
    Kris

    Just one of those nights . . . the kind when it’s best to just crawl into bed and not risk getting up. Hope your week’s gotten better.

  5. Alistair Avatar

    I think you’ve been riding the bus too much.

  6. Jeff Werner Avatar

    Jenn: Ya, great party, keg, bbq salmon and pork. Mark/Tyler: I was drunk alright…drunk on anger. Kris/Alistair: yes, the week has turned out much better…I haven’t ridden the bus once.

  7. Jonathan Aquino Avatar

    I also get frustrated with BC Transit. And the schedules certainly have some UI challenges!
    ….. Jeff – I found your post through a webpage that combines the blog posts of 109 Victoria bloggers. It’s neat to see what people in Victoria are blogging about in near real-time. If you’re curious: http://jonaquino.blogspot.com/2005/04/assembling-list-of-local-bloggers.html

  8. Tara Avatar
    Tara

    looking for a bus schedule for Victoria Texas(u.S.) but ended up on this website somehow. Never taken the bus before and was a little excited about the adventure, now I’m not so sure!At least it’s warm here should I have to wait.

  9. fergie Avatar
    fergie

    I live on Menzies 1 block from Dallas and bus it to work at dnd (dockyard) 3:30-11:30 pm shift.
    #30 goes down menzies to my stop at superior (most of the time)
    #31 is the same route except it goes down oswego to dallas
    EXCEPT after 7 pm the 30 goes down the 31 route and 27 & 28 go down the 30 route alternately from fort and douglas leaving fort and douglas at 12:05midnight, if the “mentally challenged” driver has the decency to wait until 12:05 (seeing its a transfer point)
    only after 4 complaints did the drivers start waiting until the proper time to leave
    It took about 4 months to realise 27 and 28 go down the 30 route and 30 goes down the 31 route all after 7 pm.
    How effing hard is it to change the bus # to 30 at fort and douglas before it leaves
    Do some local asylum inmates figure the routes and schedules for this system or are the route planners your typical “Lotus Land” inhabitants.
    My gooness me

  10. driver Avatar
    driver

    I think your an asshole who should stop drinking and wear a jacket.
    fuck you
    from a bus driver

  11. Wibumba Avatar
    Wibumba

    For someone who “has an art history and writing degree” you sure do suck at even whining in some worthless blog post almost nobody reads. “hunk o’ shit”? Sure sounds like you got your money’s worth. What do you wish to achieve by being a whiny bitch? No body cares about your squash tournaments or your bus rides. To prove it, I didn’t even finish reading this post. Your just some loser has has bad luck. Your only option is suicide.

  12. jkcrawford Avatar
    jkcrawford

    Fucking #6 n fucking #7. I complained as many times as possible as I see the bus late through windows. It’s ridiculous to say thanks as I never did. Show middle fingers to the damn driver and he will smile back to you like an idiot.

  13. Anonymous Avatar
    Anonymous

    omg i agree i once went on 26 and guy was like my shifts over catch number 4 so i did then had walk home from Camosun College near Hillside to Willows Beach after getting off the number 4 at 12:30 and get home at 1Am! I took 26 at 11:30 so big waste of time!!

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