Last summer I started outlining my shower routine as an exercise in process documentation and it was pretty damn boring so I never posted it. But if there’s one thing I’d remove from the list it’d be washing eyelids.
\nThey’ve probably gone years without a cleaning, your eyelids, right. Who the hell washes their eyelids? I clean nearly every part of my body except them.
\nSometimes I’ll gingerly wipe them with a face cloth, but tonight I shut them tight and went at them with a sudsy vigor I normally reserve for behind my ears. I thought I’d have a brief window between scrubbing my eyelids and rinsing them off, but I’d gone too far.
\nIt burned. Oh sweet mother they are still B-Urning! Oh my god it’s like acid under my lower lids.
\nI thought I was going to pass out. I couldn’t hear with the soap in my ears and I was blind, loosing my balance. My body was writhing and in my head I could hear the echoes of my moaning. I was in a room of red scratching pain, looking at the back of my mouth and the back of my eyes and trying to think what I should do about it.
\nAnd the water was too hot and it was like intensifying the suds. I was groping for the tap to turn the temperature down. And rubbing my eyes made it worse until I actually couldn’t open them anymore. I kept thinking about that fry pan of curry sauce on the stove at Dan and Jen’s potluck last night, the way it bubbled and simmered with red and brown spices.
\nI managed to get out of the shower. Now I am weeping uncontrollably, especially from my right eye, the thing is bloody red. I think it is actually bleeding, my lower right eye lid, on the inside.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Tonight I tried to wash my eyelids with a face cloth covered in soap because I’ve never really washed my eyelids. And now I am in pain.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[8],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=241"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1386,"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241\/revisions\/1386"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=241"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=241"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeffwerner.ca\/testa\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=241"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}